


Hot Shit

by Yeetlejuice



Category: Shin Megami Tensei
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:08:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23381452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yeetlejuice/pseuds/Yeetlejuice
Summary: Alternative Title: Kazuya Has PTSDSecondary Alternative Title: Why Kazuya Can't Crush That Damn RockJust so one is aware, I use the fanon names of Kazuya (for the protagonist), Yuji (for the Law Hero), and Takeshi (for the chaos hero).I also haven't played all the way through SMT 1, but I tried my best to write out this concept had.This story is mainly based off of my horrible luck in negotiation; every time I got the "crush this rock" option, and said "Yes", Kazuya wasn't able to pull it off, save for one time at the beginning of the game, at the time when Kazuya's mom was still alive.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	Hot Shit

It was the year 1992. It was around the early morning, and skies were clear that day. Three boys, a fairy, and a small gnome-like being were all wandering around the busy streets of Kichijoji, in a group together. One of the boys had longer hair, and wore a red jacket. The other had short, black hair, and a pair of glasses. The last was a boy with short brown hair and a green jacket. Additionally, he had an odd device strapped to his arm. The three were walking on a neighborhood street, and the one with glasses sighed, before tapping on the shoulder of the boy in green.

"Hey, Kazuya, why're we here of all places, again?"

Kazuya looked at his hand. It had a few wounds on it, evidence that he was in a fight. "We should all rest up before figuring out what to do next... so, we're going to my house. My mom would probably not mind if you and Yuji stayed over for a bit, Takeshi. Knowing her, she'd be happy that I had friends over."

"Oh, gotcha."

Yuji looked at the two demons in the party. "Would your mother be okay with _them_ staying over?"

"Hmm... I, erm... I'll figure that out when we get to there."

After some walking, they reached Kazuya's house, and walked through the main hall. Kazuya greeted Pascal and petted him a bit along the way. They entered the living room, which had to be entered before Kazuya could enter his room. In said living room was Kazuya's mother, but...

...something felt different. Off. Menacing, almost.

Takeshi stayed at the back of the group. "H-Hey, Kazuya, I dunno if this is how it's supposed to be..."

"Oh, welcome, boys! Make yourselves at home." The grin she gave was sweet, but, sickeningly so.

Yuji kept composure. "From the air of this room... I do believe that a farce of sorts is present. Something lies behind what we're seeing."

Kazuya stared at his 'mom', his gaze changing back and forth between recognition and suspicion. "I don't remember her talking quite like that..."

Kazuya's 'mom' then smirked. "Ah... you two are smarter than it seems. Well, there's no use hiding it, so..."

Out of the blue, the fake turned into its true form, a demon. "It was but a mere disguise. As for your real mother... she's dead."

Kazuya's breath hitched.

"It was quite easy, too... I crushed her entire skull just like a rock, and that was all."

Those words rung in Kazuya's mind. Just like that, she died... For the first time, it started to set in to Kazuya about what they were truly dealing with. He really was lucky to have gotten that Demon Summoning Program. Anybody who didn't have any sort of defense or tool like that was just defenseless. A demon could come about, and they'd be dead, just like that. This world truly was dangerous. Kazuya took a breath, and tried to stand tall. He couldn't give in to his feelings while an enemy was around. 

"Oh, you look so sad... Why's that? Well, no matter. I'm sure you're spoiling for a fight, so, go on! Just try and avenge your mommy! Have at you!"

The three boys and two demons engaged in a battle with the other demon.

\-----

The battle was over, and the enemy demon had faded into nothingness. There were a few moments of silence afterwards. Kazuya calmed down from the battle, and afterwards, just stood still. He didn't move, didn't speak, he just stood and stared off. The recent events and information was still on his mind, and he didn't have enough composure to take his mind off of it. He just let it stew in thought, taking shallow breaths all the while.

_"I crushed her entire skull just like a rock, and that was all."_

It rang in his mind, and wouldn't quiet down anytime soon. It was a constant reminder, of the stakes of this situation. Anybody who wasn't careful or was defenseless could easily die. Even someone like his mother. And his mother did die. His father wasn't around often, and he didn't have any siblings. As far as he knew... his entire family could be dead. That train of thought continued, and he stood still, his gaze empty. After a moment, someone finally decided to break the silence.

Yuji stepped forwards, and put a hand on Kazuya's shoulder, snapping him out of his spiraling thoughts. "Kazuya... I know this won't comfort you much, but... try not to feel too bad..."

Takeshi sighed, and glared at Yuji. "'Try not to feel too bad'? Is that all you could say?! He just learned that his mom died, Yuji. Give him a moment to himself."

Yuji backed away from Kazuya, and looked at him. Takeshi glanced at Kazuya, too. One could tell that they both wanted him to answer. To say something, anything, whether disagreeing or agreeing.

Kazuya felt like saying anything would just add fuel to a potential fire. He just slumped over, and walked over to his room.

"...we should... rest up... before figuring out what to do next..."

The other two boys and the demons followed him into his room, and they all rested. 

\-----

The hallways of the underground mall in Shinjuku were complex, and demons ran about frequently. It was mostly troublesome for the party of five, but all the encounters meant that Kazuya got in good practice with negotiations. The current encounter was with a Goblin, of the Fairy race. 

> Goblin is trying to intimidate you...

Kazuya thought for a moment, and then decided to pretend to laugh at the intimidation attempt.

"Hmph... you're one sick bastard."

Instead of trying to calm it down or ignore it, Kazuya kept pretending to laugh. At some point, the Goblin got fed up, and decided to try something. He picked up a rock, and handed it to Kazuya.

"If you think you're such hot shit, try crushing this rock with your bare hands!"

Kazuya accepted the challenge for a moment, but stopped. The word "crush" rung in his mind. He felt his breath hitch, but he didn't know why. He glanced around, and took a look at the rock. The combination of visuals, and the sentence he just heard, unearthed a thought he had been desperately trying to ignore.

_"I crushed her entire skull just like a rock, and that was all."_

It was just a simple dare, is all. It wasn't meant to remind him of that. Yet, it did. As much as he tried to shove it away, he couldn't do so. It rang in his mind, and wouldn't quiet down. But he couldn't lose composure any time soon. His breathing was shallow, but he tried taking deeper breaths. There was still a demon on the field, and a dare he accepted. He couldn't just leave it. He had to follow through. He put as much pressure into his grip as possible, but...

> Kazuya couldn't crush the rock.

He let out a heavy sigh. The rock was dropped, and then he dropped, to his knees. After that, it was all a blur. The demon started to fight, and the other two boys took care of it. He himself couldn't focus enough to pick up his knife, let alone stand. His mind was overrun with emotion, so he couldn't even process what was happening. After the battle was over, Kazuya and the others stood for a short while. Kazuya tried to regain his composure, and eventually did, after being helped up by Takeshi and Yuji. A tear could be seen in his eye, but he desperately wiped it away. 

"I think... I'll just focus on fighting demons..."

**Author's Note:**

> That's all. Most of the dialogue I wrote was improvised, based on how I saw the character's speech patterns, and also what I remembered of the actual in-game dialogue. The line "Just try and avenge your mommy!" was also based off of the line "Go on, run home and suck on your mommy's teat!", that you can get from demon negotiation. I always imagine that line being hard on Kazuya when he hears it. I feel bad for the guy...


End file.
